Much Ado over Paranoia


And my momma swore that
She would never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I'd never sing of love
If it does not exist
- Paramore's "The Only Exception" -

I know I think too much and too far into the future.

I worry about where I should be working in the future so that it’ll be easier for me to send my kids to school and sekolah agama in the afternoon, tuitions at night, and omg, piano, ballet, and karate classes!!

When, in fact, I don’t even have a boyfriend. Or have ever been in a PROPER relationship yet.

Now, let’s step over that massive block of worries in my head and concentrate on the present worry this morning.

I’m considering terminating my insurance plan. You see, when I first started it, I was confident that I would die a public servant, with a pension to my name (or my pewaris’). Therefore, my insurance covers only death/ total permanent disability, critical illnesses and death due to accident. There wasn’t any need for any medical benefits as I’m eligible to go to any government hospital, or better yet, to get a referral to a private one for any specific cases. Which I have utilised, Alhamdulillah.

However, in the shadow of the impending corporatisation, and my tormented soul begging to be released from the chains of bureaucracies (drama itu wajib), I’m heavily contemplating switching to smarter plan that incorporates medical benefits and savings.

That was the best option at that time. Yeah, I know, I should have thought of all that earlier, but I didn’t think enough into the future.

Yang I thought of was, if I stick to the plan that I have now, which doles out a hefty amount of money AFTER I DIE, in portions, for 5 years, these things could happen:

a.My kids (or pewaris) won’t be able to enjoy the money as it is in a small portion for the first 4 years. By the 4th year they may have forgotten about me, or cursing me *sigh* for leaving them with such a small amount of money.

b.The heftier portion, which will come only after the 4th year, would serve as a honeymoon treat for my husband as he enjoys it with his new wife.

Paranoid much?

Haha.

Anyhoo, this is my dilemma this morning. Another dilemma is to call up the agent, to ask if it’s ok for me to terminate my insurance (who happens to be my friend’s MOM, so yeah, another lesson learnt, don’t get financial products from people you might be afraid to call later in life!).

Gulps.

Updates belatedly

It seems a bit late to be updating about my Korean trip, but I'm sitting here, in this hall at a seminar I help co-organized, dangerously close to falling asleep, so I thought, why not? 

I was selected to represent my organisation for this training programme catered for Asian SMEs, and was one of the 9 Malaysians. There was another Malaysian lady from another government organisation, and the rest were representatives from Malaysian SMEs. It was conducted by the Korean Small Business Corp

So after that pretty hectic day, topped with the climax of that Sunday afternoon's wedding performance, I only had like an hour to throw a few more things into the suitcase, shower, pray and then shoot to the airport. The organizers had booked me on Korean Air, and the flight was close to midnight. As I waited at the lounge facebooking, I looked around, expecting to see the rest of the Malaysian entourage. Macam takde. No worries, I boarded the plane, got out my book and read till I fell asleep.

Upon arriving, I just followed the crowd to immigration clearance. I kinda panicked a little as I didn't have the time earlier that week to find out how or who was going to receive me and the rest of the entourage at the airport. But I thought, heck, there's gotta be somebody with a sign at the arrivals gate kan? Sure enough, I met Jake, our programme coordinator, with a tiny sign that I had to peer up close at to see. Waited for a while, and then finally, met the rest of the Malaysian entourage. Apparently they flew MAS, darn it, 

So I got to know the lot. We boarded the bus with the rest of the group from Thailand and Indonesia. We arrived, then checked in the Institute (SBTI), and then proceeded to our first class. The first class was more of a familiarisation to the Korean culture, and it was pretty interesting. Well, except for the part where the lecturer showed us some cultural dance/song video and dimmed the lights. i swear that was just an excuse to allow all of us to take a short nap, as most of us haven't had any rest since flying in that morning. Later that evening, we posed for a group photograph (where apparently, upon developing, I had the biggest smile), and later to a welcoming dinner.

What can I say about the food? Hmm..well, for a person who perasan she is rather adventurous when it (to be continued)

Here's some pics from the place i stayed in:


Check it out, check it out! Flat screen TV y'alls! Plus towels and a complete set of toiletries. And a tissue box! That would have eliminated half of my luggage!


Tengok tu, Complete!! Grr. I should have left my huge toiletry bag at home!


I love how, since you're not supposed to be wearing shoes in the room, the room is slightly raised, so that you can leave your shoes at the steps as you come in from the front door. And wear those kitschy slippers!


Another view of my room. I love how I look out to those trees and that almost blinding light.

Ok, bad broadband connection, unstable state of mind all of a sudden = will continue this soon.