Live a little.

If I just breathe
Let it fill the space in between
I'll know everything is alright
Breathe
Every little piece of me
You'll see
Everything is alright
If I just breathe

- Michelle Branch's "Breathe" -

Announcement, announcement!

Harry Connick Jr. and his New Orleans Big Band will be performing at the Dewan Filharmonik Petronas on March 3-5 2008. I would luurrvvee to go and would most prolly go alone if no one wants to join me, so here’s an open invitation to anyone who wants to watch Harry Connick Jr. at the DFP most prolly on the 5th March with me :) Let me know soon, and I’ll proceed to get them tickets. Btw, tickets are quite pricey at RM 240 and RM 300, so I would understand if no one wants to come along (it’s a small treat for myself, or else I won’t be able to afford it too). But do, do buzz me if anyone is interested k! Michael Buble might take some time in coming to our shores, but Harry could be a worthy substitute :)

Last weekend was quite fruitful. Jazzercise on Saturday morning, and then I baked a cake that afternoon. No kidding, an actual cake, yo! Chocolate moist cake to be exact *smacks lips*. But my effort kinda fell flat as the baking tin that I used was quite a large one, so my cake was kinda flat and wasn’t as gebu as I wanted it to be. I envisioned a super gebu cake with lashings of chocolate cream frosting…yums! Boleh takk?? Haha, DI MANAKAH DIET ANDAAAAA????!!!! Then when the cake was done, I actually left it in the hot oven, resulting in the upper layer to be quite dry..dang! Tapi, habis je my dad and bro makan hehe.

I had a pretty healthy lunch that Saturday. Beehoon soup with lotsa veggies. Unfortunately, in the morning, there was some cucur udang which I took before Jazzercise. Dinner was soto but with a shared side dish of nachos. Err, not to mention a slice of chocolate cake sendiri. Sunday morning, fried mee..dang! My mom said we’re all keturunan mee (that basically means everyone in our side of the family are quite partial towards those long stringy yellow dough). Lunch was dried wantan mee and dinner was err, can’t remember. Oh yeah, sambal tempeh, grilled brinjals and steamed chicken in soy sauce.

Yesterday, breakfast was a green apple, a piece of steamed Chinese kueh with pandan lotus filling and unfortunately, the sinful butter bun. Lunch was beehoon soto and dinner was leftover steamed chicken in soy sauce, daging masak asam and grilled fish..NO RICE!

This morning’s breakfast was oatmeal. I gotta plan what to have for lunch as I’ll be going for a double Jazzercise and Yoga session later in the evening insya-Allah.

On a lighter note, I found this website. It has some great low fat recipes that I’m dying to try out. I just got to get my butt to the stores to get the ingredients and components.

Btw, did you know an Metrobus weighs approximately 10 metric tonnes? I was waiting for a bus the other day, and I happened to glance at the side of one and that was written on the body, very near the ground. It’s nothing significant, but it helped gave me a new perspective in my daily work. Just something to remember.

On a roll.

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

- Maroon 5’s “Nothing Lasts Forever” -

I so do not like people who pangkas or cantas other people’s efforts.

Know what I’m saying?

For example, I am currently doing my bit for the environment. I have bought my own plastic container, and whenever I tapau food from the cafeteria, instead of bringing back plastic bags or styrofoam boxes, I’ll just bring my small container and load it with the food. Dah habis, cuci and simpan. Simple, almost stupid and bangang but I like to think that at least I’m reducing plastic waste. Plus, I don’t drive everyday, and although I would love to, I look at it as my way of reducing traffic, pollution and energy wastage. I am very fortunate that my workplace is served by multiple public transportation, that it would made it almost ridiculous to drive if you’re not in the vicinity of one.

So that’s my wee tiny bit of effort, but I’m a firm believer of Tesco’s tagline “Every little helps”. Sure, I’m not out there saving beached whales or chaining myself to rainforest trees but I think if everyone is a little conscious and makes an effort, it will go a long way.

So, perlu ke you come up to me and tell me that the suds from washing up my plastic container is going to go into the sea and pollute the sea? Do YOU not wash your plates with the same suds?

And, I am currently practicing drinking loads of water which I would top up from the water dispenser. The water tastes FINE to me, and water passes through your system anyway, so you are flushing toxin and prolly some of that water out. Perlu ke you pangkas I and say that the filter is not serviced properly and that there are germs stuck in the filter? Hey, there are germs EVERYWHERE for your information, and if I chose to take my daily germ intake from that water dispenser, at least it goes through my system and I flush it out.

AND at least I am exercising regularly, AND I’m not shy or LAZY enough to take public transportation to anywhere anyway so that I get off my bum and work my fat and germs off!

And, are you even ENCOURAGING me on my quest? I mean, if I am not the one making efforts for myself, who else will? Will there be anyone out there who would help me train my fat ass? Is there anyone out there who would constantly harp on me on an hourly basis, telling me to drink water because it is good for my health?

People will spout righteous things *like I always do anyway, so padan muka* when they are not in that particular position, so I would have to take it with a pinch of salt and pinch myself and tell myself to heed those “noises” and just go on.

I’m not really pissed but I sound like I am kan? I am merely being very patient and since all this is coming from a person that I respect, well, then I would have to respect his/her opinions. But seriously, if you’re just feeling insecure and feeling a tad bit like a failure for not doing so-called righteous things like what I think I’m doing, well, I would very much appreciate it if you could keep it to yourself. I don’t impose my so-called righteous efforts on you, and you are not allowed to make me feel bad or make me doubt my efforts.

On a brighter note, Yoga with Roslin was so much better yesterday! I was able to control my poses and breathing better, and although my pockets and layers of fat still hinders my flexibility and movement, I found that I could allmooooossstttt touch my nose to my knees in that previous position! Wahoo! I feel soo much better now! And we did this one post which consists us twisting our torsos so that we work on our INTESTINES...like, how cool is that yo? I've NEVER worked on my intestines like that before teehee!

Unfortunately, the no oil and sugar thing is gonna be SUPER HARD for me to follow!!!!!!!! Yesterday, I had a portion of stinky tofu, some green vegetables and get this, yummylicious terung and long beans in sambal…all of those cooked with oil la kan. Balik rumah, a bowl of yong taufoo soup and sambal ikan bilis petai was waiting for me.

Why, oh why God????

Thank god I did not have any rice with those. And I ate an hour after yoga (an hour plus actually cuz I was chatting with both Intan and Ikram after yoga and then the long drive home). And I gave the Tupperware containing the yummylicious rice keropok from Bandung a long lustful glance and looked away.

Every little helps, every little helps, every little helps. Breathe, breathe, breathe.

So, I’m going to compromise. I can do the no sugar thing, but I’m going to TRY to go off fried food and major carbs (rice, pasta, eeekkss!!!). And I will stick to my workouts religiously. And if I don’t see any improvements, I will tell myself it is ok, at least I am off my butt and exercising, and eating somewhat healthily.

Then maybe I’ll go to London Weight Management or something.

Kidding.


p/s: Che Sabbs, you and I, we can both do it!!!!! I read about you going off rice too teehee! Update, update on your status tau :)

The first breath

(Swing) Swing, Swing from the tangles of
My heart is crushed by a former love
Can you help me find a way
To carry on again.

- The All-American Rejects' "Swing, Swing" OST American Wedding -

Damnsit.

So there I was going holier-than-thou with my kononnya healthy breakfast and lunch, plus snacks. I was so proud of myself. Oatmeal, fruits, grilled stuff, plus the gallon of water and more.

Till I got home and faced the beef rendang. Then all resolve to not eat rice just went down the drain.

Arrghhhhh!!!!!

Tsk.

Today is Yoga with Roslin Day. Let’s hope I get through today’s session. I just met up with Dr. Dancer this morning to pick up my prescriptions and to ask for some dieting advice, and she strictly told me to lay off carbs, oil and sugar. That basically rules out FOOD.

Gulps.

Will try my very, very, very best Doc. I really need to do this, so, I gotta, like you said, psyche myself up.

Yeah!

Btw, A.J. Rochester lost her earlier weight pretty easily, I think. That lady ate junk food on a daily basis, plus she consumed alcohol copiously. So, once she lay off those, she was able to shed pounds. From 109 Kg to 99 Kg. Pretty easy right?

But what she did in addition are those daily exercises, starting with the tummy tucks and butt squeezes. And that stairs thingy which requires you to climb up and down the first step of any flights of stairs that you have to climb twenty times. Those little things add up, and for a hefty 109 kg woman who has never been to the gym in the past 8 years, that was a pretty good enough start.

Fyi, she lost a grand total of 45 Kg. That's like, one of my best friend, yo.

Other tips from the good doctor:

1. Fruits are good but not just any type. Papayas and guavas are good. Mangoes, cikus, durians, cempedaks and nangkas are not, because they are sweet. Watermelon is the worst because it's just sugar. Starfruit is apparently the best *which is why it's called the star*. Apparently it has high anti-oxidants.

2. Nuts, sultanas and raisins can be good but in moderation. Nuts to be avoided are cashews because they have high oil content. Almond, pistachio and walnuts are fine. But she recommends 10 of each nuts and raisins per serving.

3. High protein diet is not advisable because it will mess up your kidneys. You won't be able to see the effect immediately because it is a long-term one. It is when you get your blood checked and found your uric acid content high *like what I did* is one way to gauge. The other way, albeit the nasi sudah menjadi bubur way, is when you find that you have gout. Nuff said. She recommends doing it only for a short time, and then revert back to a normal diet but with halved carbs.

4. Dinner should be no later than 7 p.m. (I don't know if this is achievable or not, but again, will try my best. Note to self: Talk to mom!)

5. Meehoon soup also has carbs (and oil). Apparently, the required meehoon portion should only be HALF a chinese rice bowl. Gulps.

6. No red meats, more white meats. More fish and soy products like tofu.

Hence, no carbs, oil and sugar. Twice weekly Jazzercise and Yoga sessions. Lotsa prayers and water in between. I really, really need to discipline myself, motivate myself and push myself this time.

Boleh ke nie? Adakah blog ini akan menjadi satu weight-losing blog???

Kita tunggu dan lihat.

p/s: How in the world could I have ever liked Darren Hayes???

Bent on becoming a pretzel.

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you wanna go,
and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
if it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile.
But more than anything, more than anything...

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

- Rascal Flatts’ “My Wish” –

Corny, but that is my wish for everyone in 2008. How convenient that they’ve turned it into a song, haha!

Btw, here’s a tip: You should only eat AFTER an hour of exercising. This is so that your body will burn your existing body fat first before it starts burning the fat that you would ingest in a meal after the exercise session.

My, aren’t we the positive one.

Since I’ve run out of new things to try out this New Year (due to lack of sufficient funds and mobility) I’ve decided to give yoga @ Studio W a try. I know, I know, it seems so clichéd and so trendy to be doing it at the moment, but once you’re deep into the routine, you’d be thinking, “why the heck am I doing this??!!” or better yet, “help, I want to goo hoommeeee!!!!”. You can’t even SPELL trendy after a session.

My first session was with the uber skinny Roslin. She had this soothing and melodious voice which tends to disappear into thin air once my eyes started watering from holding a long balancing pose. During my first session, I had so much sweat dripping from every possible nook and cranny onto the yoga mat that I’m constantly mentally apologizing to Intan for deflowering her yoga mats and mentally calculating the cost of buying my own (so that I won’t leave yucky mats back for other users!). After the first session, my ENTIRE body aches, I suddenly sport blue veins running snakily up my upper arms (those I’ve never seen before) and my arms involuntarily twitches at any mention of yoga or balance.

The second session with Sam went better. Unfortunately, I was seated next to this slim and extremely flexible girl who could do all the poses so effortlessly while I huff and puff my way through. Mind you, that was only the sun salutations which were used to warm our bodies up! Not very encouraging, I must say. About 15 minutes into the routine, I was back to thinking, “why the heck am I doing this??!!” or better yet, “help, I want to goo hoommeeee!!!!”. But I stuck through it, and even though I was the only one in class who had to do the poses a little differently due to the pockets of fat I have everywhere on my body, I still find myself trying out the poses after the class (which in my books means I’m hooked!). There was one pose thought that had me stumped, and it involves stretching your legs high above your head with no support. Yeah right, next week please! Ooh, and one of the best yet most painful part was when we were in a sitting position with our legs straight out in front of us, and Sam wanted us to try and touch our noses to our knees (again, yeah right!). So, there I was hovering in the air (as that’s as FAR as I could go, my pot belly just wouldn’t yield!) and counting down from 8, when suddenly at 3 I felt something heavy on my back, pushing my nose to my knees! Sam had casually leaned on me, all of her 40kg frame on my back!

Can I say ouch??!


But amazingly enough, I held on, despite squealing in pain, haha! Sam mentioned that if we end our yoga session with a sitting pose, we tend to sleep better at night. Yup, she got that right. But that was prolly also due to my overzealous (read: kiasu) efforts in trying to cram in as many workouts as my body can tahan, as before that excruciating yoga session, I was bouncing away for Jazzercise :p

Like I said, no one can push me better than Intan.

On another note, I’m super duper ecstatic because one of my best girlfriends is back in town!! Whoopedeedooo!!!! Nonzies has been away for more than a year, and in that course of time, she has gotten married, gave birth to the cutest little tyke I’ve ever seen (discounting my gorgeous nephews and nieces of course!), and, she’s now a qualified teacher. Seeing as her hubby is working in KL, she has managed to wrangle a teaching spot back in this wondrous state *can u tell I’m half delirious here?* So now, she’s only about 30-45 mins away..yay!!!

Last weekend, the other girlfriends and I made our way to her new place for lunch and a much awaited gossip session. We had some KFC, some home-cooked food and a dozen Big Apple donuts. After a messy lunch session with the antics of little Adeel amusing us, we just hung out in her living room, tonyoh-tonyoh her son’s cheeks and chatted. It’s been a long while since we did that, and ever since she moved back, our outings have always been incomplete and when we all DO meet up, it’s always in some overpriced place with little privacy. So, last Saturday was the first time in years that we could just let our hair down and hang. Just like we used to do back in those uni years.

I miss you girls.

On a much sober note, I do hope that little Sharlinie will be found soon. My heart goes out to her parents and family and I pray that we may never have to go through the pain, agony and anguish faced by them, ever.

Oh, help.

In cards and flowers on your window,
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Sometimes beginnings aren’t so simple.
Sometimes goodbye’s the only way.

- Linkin Park's "Shadow of the Day"

Dang.

I waas tinkering around and ended up messing my template. Now i gotta stick with this one till i figure out which skins to use and how to go about putting it up.

Yucks.