Ceritera

can't change this feeling
i'm way out of touch
can't change this meaning
it means too much
never been this lonely
never felt so good
can't be the only one misunderstood

i remind myself of somebody else
feeling like i'm chasing
like i'm facing myself alone
i've got somebody elses thoughts in my head
i want some of my own

- Lifehouse’s “Somebody Else’s Song” –


Padan muka, padan muka, padan muka.

*sigh*

Am at crossroads again, therefore, susceptible to temperamental postings. But today, to lift the gravity of the situation, I’ll talk about the 2 day trip that I took to the Netherlands back in September. Yes, I avoid my problems by concentrating on other things instead of confronting them like other normal people would do.

The trip to Netherlands was planned earlier, but without much thought to the itinerary. All I know is I wanted to go to a different European destination. Was leaning pretty heavily on Italy, but I guess that would be something to work for next year *cross fingers*. The couz wanted so badly to go the Keukenhoff flower fields, but since those tulips bloom only in April/ May, we decided to go on an organized tour visiting the customary windmills, cheese and clog-making factories instead. The lil sis was just happy to come along on a sponsored trip, cheh.

We were pretty skint travelers, so we opted for a 12-hour bus ride which would traverse France and Belgium. I’ve done this 12-hour bus ride thingy so it wasn’t something new or painful to experience. Honestly! I mean, you get on the bus at 8 p.m, ride on till you arrive in Dover, board the ferry, ogle at the duty-free shop on board, get back on the bus and snooze till you reach your destination. Easy peasy. The bus ride was smooth, despite the late start, and of course, we wanted to buy everything on board the duty-free shop, but made rash promises to ourselves that we would get them on our way back nanti, and stuff ourselves with the bekal of croissants, biscuits and junk food that we brought on the trip. Told ya, we were skint.

Arrived in Amsterdam on a rainy Monday morning, and needed to brush our teeth and sleep off from our faces. Didn’t have change to pay the toilet toll, so had to buy some coffee. Was very tempted to buy the breakfast cereal with some yoghurt in a cup to start my morning off, but thought of the many souvenirs that may need to be purchased, so kept tummy quiet. I guess the underlying motive for choosing Amsterdam was because everyone could speak English there hehe. And that was a major, major boon for us. Which really helped us everywhere we went.

We didn’t have any reservations at any hotel/hostel/b&bs, but what we do know is that we needed a place to lay our heads on for 1 night, and it has to be near to the main train station at the Damrak. Firstly, because we needed to get on the train to go back to the bus station the next night for our trip back to the Londres. Secondly, because the main tour operators would start their tours on the Damrak. So, upon arriving, in the misty rain, we started searching for a respectable hotel. It’s no mean feat pun, because the Damrak is lined with convenience for the tourists, be it fast food takeaways, souvenir shops, halal kebab shops, hotel/hostel/b&bs and the complimentary sex museum *no, I didn’t visit it, call me a prude if you want, but I was more interested in other aspect of the city*. We chose this respectable but kinda pricey place *I think la* called Hotel van Gelder, that had a tour operator operating on the ground floor. Sparse décor ye, with super steep steps going up to our room on the 3rd Floor, but was clean and respectable la hehe. After dumping our stuff, and pooh-poohing the rain, we went for a walk around the city.

Our hotel at night:



We registered for the 9-hour tour the next day first, then started walking down Damrak, stopping in the many souvenir shops, armed with a tourist map. Amsterdam is renowned for its canals and its museum, both of which we didn’t explore. We didn’t go on any canal cruise, nor did we jejak into any museum, the uncultured people we are. I wanted to go on a canal cruise, but since it was raining, and we planned on walking and I found out that many were concentrating on sights instead of places of attraction, I decided not to blow my money on it. We walked down to the Royal Palace and Madame Tussaud, and took pictures in the rain. Decided to walk down to the Flower Market instead to satisfy the couz’s appetite for flowers. Turns out there weren’t as many flowers as there were tulip bulbs and blue-white souvenirs hehe. We decided to walk further down to this flea market, but it was disappointing. Not a patch on London’s Portobello or Petticoat Lane. But the scenery along the way was picturesque and the canals we passed were very pretty. And yes, we had to dodge cyclists who would arrogantly ring their bells whenever we stray on to their path.

Amsterdam's trademarks; canals & bicycles:




It rained the whole day, at times heavily. During lunch, we took shelter in this departmental store with the most amazing Marche-like food court. They had the most amazing and mouth-watering array of pastries and breads, salads, pastas, meats, fish and deserts. We couldn’t help salivating and decided to have our lunch there, our bekal conveniently forgotten. After lunch, we decided to go to the Albert Cuypmarket, to have a look see, on our first tram ride. The tram we were on had a ticket booth in the middle of the coach, but I think that’s prolly for a certain type of trams.

Something funny but kinda unpleasant happened while we were at the market. We were passing by all these stalls, looking at the trinkets when we arrived at this cool nuts, chocs and seeds stall. They had all kinds of nuts with variations such as sugar/cheese/cinnamon/candy/chocolate/etc –coated, dried fruits of imaginable kinds (dried cherries, plums, blueberries, etc) and they had home-made chocolates with all kinds of fillings. Those chocolates caught our eyes because they were served in huge blocks and will be sold per weight. What made us squeal in the delight was the genitalia-shaped chocolates. (!!!) So, there we were looking at those, urmm, tall-shaped ones *raised left eyebrow*, when my sister decided to snap pictures of them, haha! I did too, albeit at a further angle without much focusing. We got this pretty sleazy comment from a passer-by which we ignored while we decided on what to purchase from this stall as they had kindly allowed us to snap pics of their wares.

Now, it’s been raining all day right? So, the street was wet, and so were the canvas tents that they put up. All of a sudden, this freak wind blew, and hit the water gathered on those canvas roofs, which in turn splashed the water on 2 unsuspecting innocent bystanders and soaked them both! Me and my couz that is! Arrgghh!!! It was so sudden that I was just stunned into silence while both my sis and couz screamed! God, that was humiliating! And disgusting! Our corduroy jackets were soaked, and our hair was wet, and it was kinda funny, cuz it’s actually sunny at that time. The stall owners of course, couldn’t help laughing as they handed us paper towels. My sis was laughing her head off and telling us that it’s God’s punishment for staring at those chocolates for too long!



We just didn’t really have the heart to go anywhere after that, so we went back to the hotel, dried our clothes, had hot showers and had a long nap. I think the three of us had developed a slight cold after walking in the rain the whole day and that unwelcome shower, so I was thankful of the fact that I happened to have some Lemsip in my bag, and forced them to drink a sachet each. My sis is prone to colds, so we have to be extra wary when she gets sick.

That night, after the nap, and feeling a little bit better, we went off to the Red Light District to have a look see. No problems with directions as everyone was basically headed towards that area, although we were kinda shy about asking for directions from our hotel receptionist hehe. It was getting dark, but still early so there were lots of people walking up and down the street. We’re talking obvious elderly tourists and young college kids, so I thought it was pretty safe for us to walk around. Besides, my couz seemed to be the only hijab-ed person, so I didn’t want to risk walking around too late.

The Red Light District was interesting, but since it was early, I guess it was pretty tame. We did see a few ladies in the windows with their lingerie on, smiling suggestively and dancing, but none of those lurid poses you see mostly on souvenir t-shirts. They were of varying kinds though, the smart looking one with her hair in a bun and glasses, the manly-looking one in a nurse uniform, the blonde and brunette ones. We just went round the area once, and then we went off to look for HRC.

This is one of the canals we crossed before going to the Red Light District:



To get to HRC, we needed to get on a tram, but before that I went to buy these cool touristy umbrellas with the tulip flower as the handle. Mine was a slightly larger one with a white transparent shade, while my sis got an opaque red one. Those umbrellas really came in handy later on during our trip. After buying some t-shirts at the HRC, and more pics snapping, we went back to the Damrak to look for dinner. My sis and I had earlier on spied these 2 cafes in the alleys selling colourful, scrumplicious looking Belgium waffles, with a myriad of toppings, yumss! So we went back to those shops and after buying a strawberry and whipped cream topped, chocolate-dipped one, we ducked into a kebab shop to have our dinner. Oh, by the way, there’s this frites (chunky fries) shop on the Damrak which was voted the best frites shop in Amsterdam, where you’ve gotta try the frites..yummmo!!! The Dutch are known to have their frites with mayonnaise instead of ketchup, and in my case, with a dollop of melted cheddar cheese topping….such bliss!

Lookie, desserts:





After breakfast the next day, we checked out and went on our 9-hour tour. The tours over there offer basically the same things; the Zaanse Schans windmills, the clog-making factory with those beautiful clogs that you can buy in your size and in such funky colours too, the cheese making factory where I bought the smoked cheese and the one with cumin seeds in it, then to the fishing village where you can have your picture taken in a traditional Dutch costume (I didn’t though, not my kind of thing) and a boat ride. What I found most interesting was the existence of their lush lands which they achieved by draining lakes. These lakes provide really good soil for their cows, which in turn produced super-quality milk to be exported. So, these lands (formerly lakes) area actually below sea level, and they make up for a big portion of the Netherlands (according to the guide, Netherlands actually means low lands). You could really see the difference between the sea level canals which holds the water from the lakes and the depth of the low lands. Pretty cool actually.



Pretty clogs:



In the afternoon, we were taken to the Delft Blue pottery museum in the Delft village where they produce the Delft Blue potteries. The potteries were beautiful and expensive, even the tiniest dish cost about 25 Euros. We intended to get something for our mom there, but since it was too expensive, she had to settle for something else. Then it was of to the Hague where they showed us Queen Beatrice’s palace, the ambassador’s homes, and a few other buildings of importance (can’t remember la pulak). After that, they took us to visit Madurodam for an hour.

Delft Blue Potteries:



Madurodam was built by this couple to commemorate their son who died in the war. It is like a miniature town, with tiny figures and precise scaled down buildings, monuments and historical sites in the Netherlands. An hour wasn’t exactly enough, but we ran wild with our cameras there. What was also amazing was that everything seemed intact, and in its place, with nary a trace of vandalism. I’m sorry, but I don’t foresee that happening in our country. After Madurodam, they took us to see the beach where stalls and restaurants will be erected only during the summer. It’s a pity the weather wasn’t that sunny, as there weren;t that many people on the beach.

Minis:





We arrive at Damrak at around 7 plus in the evening, and had some time to buy more frites and last-minute souvenirs, before going back to London on our 10 p.m bus. It’s a good thing that we budgeted for unforeseen circumstances, as we missed our stop while taking the train back to the bus station. Alas, the bus did not board a ferry this time, and that dashed my hopes of buying duty-free stuff (just like in 05!). Instead we went back on the train, with the bus entering a long, narrow container, for the journey across the Channel.

And here's the umbrella's debut:



That was the second trip I made with a bunch of people, who have not been to that destination, moi included, acting as a group leader, sorta. I think I’m game for more *winks*, although the fact that language wasn’t a barrier helped immensely. It wasn’t particularly a thrilling trip, nor was it adventurous, but I was glad that I made that trip. It helped that my couz and sis are not whiny people who don’t mind walking for hours and relying on their, sometimes, scatter brained leader here haha!

So where to next? Onwards Italia!

It’s all been done.

I feel like walking the world
Like walking the world
You can hear she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
She fills up every corner like she's born in black and white
Makes you feel warmer when you're trying to remember
What you heard
She likes to leave you hanging on her word

Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see (Suddenly I see)
Why the hell it means so much to me

- KT Tunstall's "Suddenly I See" -

I think my week started out well, post the Raya makan-makan session I had the previous weekends. Thanks soo much to those who made it, and to those who couldn’t, thanks for the thought. And thanks too, for all the goodies! We’re still trying to finish them all! This year, I opted to have just a small one, which proved kinda difficult, because my small one would inadvertently turned into a medium-sized one. I guess it helps that the makan-makan session was only for my closest friends and people from the office, instead of the ones with my sis & bro’s friends, but it was still overwhelming. Due to the downpour that weekend, we weren’t able to utilize the garden, so everyone kinda smushed up in the house. I think it’s cozy, but I apologize to those who weren’t able to sit and eat properly (like poor Mia and her parents). I should though, after all this years, come up with a formula to entertaining. I can never find the time to sit and chat with everyone (of course not at leisure), but I can never remember what I did to while those hours away! Maybe tis the constant welcoming and ushering to the buffet table? Or trying to engage in snatches of conversations? Or trying to give the right directions to someone over the mobile? Or just filling up the depleting food? Next thing I know, people are already leaving and saying good bye…  I would dearly loved to sit and chat with some of them, those I would only get to see during these yearly open-houses affairs, but I can only do that at other people’s functions. So, maybe I’ll split the timing or something next time, so I can get some time out with all my favourite guests.

The family got a shock on Tuesday when we found out that my cousin passed away. Innalillahiwainnaillaihiraajiun. My cousin has Down’s Syndrome and is about 23 so he’s been in my life practically forever, but he has lived all his life in Penang, so we only got to see him once or twice a year whenever he comes down to KL. I took the day off to accompany my parents up north to visit him for the last time, and though I was never close to him, we were all affectionate cousins. He loved my grandma so much, and whenever he comes back to the kampong, he would call out for her, and whenever they sit next to each other, he would smile at her, stroke her face, hair or hands. He also had a soft spot for my dad, because although my dad is kinda reserved, he would layan this cousin of mine. I can’t believe he’s gone so soon. I guess we knew it would be a matter of time since his heart is defective, but we thought we’d prolly have him for a longer period of time. I overheard that his mom was worried about leaving him when she goes for Haj next year, and in a way, this is his way of alleviating her worries. My aunt is going to be lonely though, because he has always been at home, and she has always had him to fuss over. We’re going to miss you, and you will always be here in our hearts.

However, God is great. The day he passed away, he made way for our cousin's baby boy to make an appearance in this world. Alhamdulillah. So, congrats new mummy, i can't wait to see my latest nephew!

I went for a job interview last week, though it’s nothing much, I was called up for a second interview. Guess we’ll see la how it goes. I’m not all that keen to leave but then again, I so do not know what I want in life and my mind is always in tangles. So, we’ll just take it one day at a time.

The week was capped by birthday celebrations, open houses, tea parties and a sweet wedding. Thanks to the girlfriends and significant others, Lida, Nerrs, Amy and congrats to Azura. Loved the rosti,apple pie, briyani,fried beehoon, spaghetti, scrumplicious brownies and yummy nasi minyak. Oh yeah, thank you also to the Indian lady who hanged around our shop on Saturday morning, waiting for it to be opened. Silly me drove all the way to the mall, and realized I left the keys to the shop at home, so I was about 15 minutes late. I nearly missed her, (and would have missed the sale too!) but she saw me raising the shutters just in time hehe.

Oh and thanks to the most beautiful Arab family last night for restoring my faith in parental match making. A beautiful union of beautiful people with beautiful souls, and a beautiful baby to match.

p/s: I'm currently reading Neil Gaiman's Stardust to prepare me for the movie. I thought of buying the book months earlier, but only because I think Neil Gaiman is hot after reading Neverwhere. Mana la i tau diorang nak buat movie? I've been busy watching the trailers at stardustmovie.com. (see Diva, i told you my infatuation lasts only for a few weeks!) So, anyone up to watching it? lemme know k! you know how i don't usually watch movies, so grab this once in a lifetime chance to watch a movie with...ME! haha!

On Vanilla Twinings high.

In the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh it has begun...
Oh dear you look so lost, eyes are red and tears are shed,
This world you must've crossed... you said...

You don't know me, you don't even care, oh yeah,
She said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah..

- Agustana’s “Boston” -

I think I should be more of a control freak. I should know everything that’s going on, and not give out answers like “I’m not quite sure la” or worse yet, “I don’t know”. I should KNOW but then again, I was advised to stay on my turf, to not risk being bullied. However, I like it when people think they can depend on me, so I guess, being bullied might just be an unpleasant side effect to what I’m doing. But ooh, how I HATE, HATE, HATE not being in the know but then being asked to follow up on “things”..argh!

On another note, Raya went well. A tad quieter, but we got everything done. The first ever Takbir, the customary grave visiting, the prayers, the visiting, and the soon-to-be annual visit to LaSecret Recipe with the cousins. Quorum tak cukup, but the noise we made was plenty enough. I even got some cousins to record a dedication video which I will be sending out to my sis soonish. This year however, we discovered (well, more like rediscovered) the joys of UNO! So, there we were, the older clan mentoring the younger ones, and then having a game of our own. Twas fun! At least, the latest addition to the family (new cousin in-law) got to hang out with us properly and not look too awkward in our company.

However, testament to my lack of need for taking Raya leaves, I spent third Raya browsing in the mothership of Swedish furnishings, IKEA. Ramai jugak yang Raya kat IKEA tahun nie ye, haha! So, 4th Raya, back in the office, just hanging around.

I wanna post pictures, but too malas to upload and edit. I will one of these days. Oh yeah, does anyone (if anyone else is still reading this) know where I can get really pretty home accessories and furnitures? IKEA is sometimes so overrated, and I hate conventional buying. I’m in this dire need to redecorate my room, and desperately need new curtains. The ones I have makes me wanna tear them down whenever I look at it. But since new curtains might cost about a thousand RMs, and since I’m saving up to go to UK & Europe again next year, that’s not an option (unless the Mum says it’s time for a change, in that case, yahoo!). So, I’m just down to hunting for a really gorgeous table lamp, pretty jewelry boxes and glass photo frames. I saw one beautiful lamp in BritishIndia, but it’s waaay too expensive, although if my heart wrestles my sensibilities to the ground, I might just close both eyes and purchase it. Then that would really mean just roti and cheese for lunch for a month. Damn.

Oh yeah, eve of Raya, I had like the most soothing facial experience ever! Usually, after a normal session with our beautician, I’d go home with this huge headache from squinting as she korek-ed out all the pores and discard those yucky yucky things for an hour. But this time, since I bought this voucher for this pricey facial elsewhere, I was treated to a foot bath and shoulder massage as well. And that was before the facial! The extraction part only hurt minimally, and I actually fell asleep during the session. Howzabout that?! And the oxygen-infusion thingy was superb, it felt like walking through the Himalayas (not that I’ve been there pun, but I supposed that’s what it should feel like). Hated the price, looved the facial. I even booked in for a hot stone massage this weekend as for first-timers, they’ll slash half the price, wahoo! I’m soo looking forward to it, I’ve been wanting a massage like, from the first week in London cause I was sooo spent from futile house-hunting efforts.

Oh, and I surrendered and bought Jane Austen’s “Persuasion”. Sucker.

Added: OMG, I’ve gotten an invite to use Skype, not from a friend or the lil sis (kureng asam punye budak tak ingat kakak die pun), but from a person I’m dealing with. An older, father-material person whose got a pretty chic wife ! Weeiirrrdddddddd!

Why? Because I’m a sad poof.

Now I see, this is the way it's supposed to be
I met you and now I see
This is the way it should be

This is the way it should be, for lovers
They shouldn't go it alone
It's not so good when your on your own

So come to me, now we can be what we want to be
I love you and now I see
This is the way it should be
This is the way it should be

- Paul McCartney’s “This Never Happened Before” OST The Lake House-

It’s Raya eve, and I’m still stuck in the office. By choice. Just because I had to make good on my promise to my boss when I vehemently justified my long leave by saying “But I won’t be taking any Raya leave or any more leaves!”.

Nah, padan muka.

Wasn’t so bad. It’s a speedy drive this morning, parking was easy, office was calm and quiet, and I had more time to view more Keandra clips online. Why? Because I’m a sad poof haha. I even had a quiet discussion with my other boss, both of us calculating the hours we have left in the office as stated by the office memo. Siap buat timeline ok. We deduced that since today is Friday, we’re only obligated to stay on for 3 hours and 15 minutes. I love this boss of mine.

I’ve decided to bestow titles to my different category of best friends. Unfortunately, I have quite a few, but they are all very, very dear to me, and although I’ve never much display it, I love them to bits. So, the Totz and Eilmyster will be “Best Buds Dunia Akhirat”, the Nonz, Elle Chico and Niezarul will be “My Girlfriends” and the Diva and La Pacina “BFFs”. Yes, I have nothing to do, despite my table being once more, covered with files. This was also brought about by wanting to use the BFFs term on those two, but not wanting to sideline the rest. Hehe.

Tis the season to be merry, forgiving and to seek forgiveness. Therefore, this is my public apology to all those I’ve hurt in the past, and my public begging for forgiveness. May we all remain friends forever, and may nothing really seriously damaging come between us.

I also have a tiny resolution to make, but knowing how well I renegade on my resolutions before, don’t count so much on it. But some support would be nice. Here goes: I aim to make my friendships worth more by caring a little bit more, opening up my heart and soul a little bit more, to be a little less self-centered and will try to see the world a little differently. Insya-allah.
I’ll leave you with these two beautiful clips from, where else, The Lake House.

Have a blessed and safe Syawal.

"

Sounds of laughter are shades of life.

Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow waves of joy are drifting thorough my open mind
Possessing and caressing me
Jai guru deva om

Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

- Beatles’ “Across The Universe” -

Mavish kebabs.
Ben & Jerry’s.
Krispy Kreme donuts.

Yup, I just got back from a month’s stay in the UK. Well, 27 days to be exact, of which 3 were spent in ye olde Scotland and another 3 were spent in Amsterdam.

And boy, was I spent. Financially and physically.

The lil sis is *I hope* *cross fingers* settling in down well with her new roomie (who’s so pretty, I swear she looks like Yasmin Yusuf) in their tiny flat overlooking a hospice. It’s tiny but with a charm of its own. I hope she’s coping well with the long commute to school though. Can’t help it if her artsy fartsy school decided to be on the fringes of all things touristy.

I wish I can cram everything I want to say in today’s post (cuz, apparently, I’m itching to write), but today we shall concentrate on her super duper cute Cypriot-English landlord (who will be referred to as Lord D henceforth).

*sigh*

I’m never one to fall for a blonde, blue-eyed boy. Especially not tall, lanky ones. But this one…

Rrrrr…..

The first time we met, it struck us as odd that he wouldn’t meet our eyes when he speaks to us. And a lot were spoken at that time, concerning rents, conditions of flat, safety of area, yada yada. He seemed to concentrate on our chests (despite mine being upgraded over the course of a year, still not flattering ok), or over our shoulders, or just our general direction. Upon further discussion with the lil sis and the couz (hey, good looking boy on display, a hell lot of conversation maketh), we hypothesized that he could be having vision problems. Specifically, long-sightedness. Hypothesis was further strengthened by lil sis’s observation of extra large pc monitor screen in his office, and huge icons on his desktop. Not to mention the A4 sized calculator with huge buttons. I spied the LOTR audiobooks. And the Tag Heuer box, carelessly discarded, not that it matters in this hypothesis (hmm, Lord D has impeccable taste). Lil sis saw the actual Tag on his wrist. We think alike, her and I.

The couz (who, by now has developed a mini crush on Lord D), was by now wisely saying that it’s good that Lord D has vision problems, it means he commits less sins. Haha. We were all trying to justify our secret crushes. Tee hee.

After another session of giggling over him, we coyly went over and ask him if we could buy off him the television in the lower flat, and he dropped the bomb,

“Aw, my missus would kill me”

Dammit!

Dah kawin rupanye mamat nie. *sigh*

Then it was another round of analyzing by the lil sis, the couz and I. The lil sis speculated that it was an arranged marriage, because he’s pretty young. He looks like he could be younger than I am. I didn’t think that was possible, because a) please, that’s so not London and b) please, he who looks like that, to succumb to an arranged marriage? Pfftt.

The couz, again with the wisdom of the elders and with the wistful tone of lost love, deduced that his wife must be a beauty, something that the lil sis quickly agreed. Apparently, their theory would be, someone with such a disadvantage (vision problems, although we weren’t quite sure what) would have God’s help in other departments.

In the meantime, I was just devastated to find that someone else is enjoying his cheeky smiles, his generous although slightly arrogant nature and that lanky physique. Haha.

Lord D has been, so far, an ideal landlord. Fixing our problems almost instantly, preparing our flat so that it would be livable, and generally, answering our petty questions patiently. I was relieved to leave the lil sis and her roomie in hands of someone I could trust. Well, so far (alhamdulillah, insya-Allah).

However, I do have this known fixation for googling up things at random. So, yesterday, I thought I’d google this guy up. He has a pretty unique name, although I guess, in Turkey, it wouldn’t be as unique. I remembered how he introduced himself,

“D*****. Like the whirling *********.”

*sigh*

Imagine my surprise to find that this guy, is actually a paralympian. Not just any paralympian, a 35 time medalist, siap cipta European record for some stroke.

He was even nominated as disabled sportsman on the year!!!!!

BOLEH TAAAKKKKK???!!!!

I don’t know what surprised me more; the fact that he competes in the blind category due to his blurry vision since birth (we WERE right about his vision problems!), or that he is an Olympic swimmer. Paralympian ok, no joke.

And yes, I double checked with photos and stuff.

Of course I had to call my couz up and scream over the phone with her.

I mean, how cool is that??? Ok la, I don’t know what’s cooler, the fact that we know him, or that he’s this paralympian swimmer. What’s more, he is even considering entering the 2012 events. Like, we know a potential celebrity swimmer y’all. I don’t even know a Malaysian athlete *shrugs*.

I know I’m prolly the only one gushing over this, but I can’t help it. I get excited over things other people don’t. Heh. Twas a good thing we didn’t know who he was when we met him till the day I left, kalau tak, tersengih-sengih la I every time bump into him. Although, that was always the case, as *giggle* I couldn’t help it.

Oh, and he has this way of saying “Hello” that is so adorable, but also totally cracks us up. Imma gonna try and get the lil sis to get a recording, haha!

Other than that, I’ve missed looking at men in sharp business suits, striding down the streets of London. Why oh why don’t Malaysian men look as good and as confident? Although I have to admit, the confident Malaysian ones are the more mature one, and even though I’m developing unhealthy crushes on some..but that’s another story for another day.

Liverpool St. in the morning is my idea of a mini eye-candy heaven tucked in the city.

Modjo

I’m tryin to make me go to rehab
I said no, no, no
Yes I been black, but when I come back
You wont know, know, know

- Amy Winehouse’s “Rehab” -

I wanted to write about something that happened just last week, but it’s too scary to pen it down, and although I crossed my fingers and touched on woods, I’m not superstitious. Well, not seriously superstitious. However, jotting down that little tale might result in bad karma, so I rather not share it.

Not just yet.

I’ve missed writing and it looks like I’ve lost my ability to write freely. Maybe it’s because of the overwhelming amount of things that are stored up here waiting to be poured out. Or perhaps, that my world’s landscape has changed a bit since my last post, that I find hard to keep up. Or, might I actually be stuck for words?

Of late, I find myself not measuring up to certain expectations. I think my friends expect me to be a bit more carefree, less serious, more fun, shall we say. I think the workplace expects me to be a little bit smarter each day. I think my mom expects me to tie the knot by the end of this year or next (with who or what, is actually the question I ask myself back whenever this topic comes up). My sister, expects me to be a style doyenne, donning on the latest trendy outfits, and experimenting with my looks.

It always feels like I have to deliver. I always feel like the other party will feel sorely disappointed, and as I’m a firm believer in what goes around, comes around, I try to. Deliver, that is. Get the job done.

So, maybe, this will indeed be the change I’m looking for.

Other than that, I’m still waiting for my modjo to write daily mundane going-ons.

Bring it on, modjo.