*Warm and Fuzzy Feeling*

Strangers in the night exchanging glances
Wond’ring in the night
What were the chances we’d be sharing love
Before the night was through.

- Frank Sinatra's "Strangers in the night" -

i like, totally dig my new layout, don'tcha?

hehehe...am all giggly this morning, cuz i've just had a dose of my favourite vegetarian pie from the nearby bakery. I am actually feeling kinda drowsy (but it's prolly all the food..uggh!) but partly, it's because of the hectic lifestyle (ahem) that i lead nowadays. Well, for starters, as one of the new officers in the office (read: macai) we are available for any type of bullying by the senior officers for as long as we can survive it (well, at least, until the next batch comes in, which i don't foresee happening in the near future). Hectic equals to reaching home nearly 10 pm 3 times a week, only having the strength to jump in the shower and straight to bed.

For the past 2 months.

What am i talking about? well, the annual dinner performances that myself and a bunch of other poor helpless souls that have been forced to participate. And what are we doing? (Good God, help me type this down here cuz i don't think i ever want to be doing this again!)

Dancing.

Yes. Menari. No, no, not Wade Robson type of breakneck moves, nor the graceful Grace Kelly manoeveurs. It's actually a traditional dance that comprise of the moves from the different cultures in Malaysia, which they called the muhibbah dance. Yes, it's that corny.

Dancing, in its entirety, is actually ok, because i've discovered i have not sweated that much in a very, very long time. Dancing with other people is also ok, because i get to know more people in the office and can now act silly with them should the occasion requires me to do so. What i can't stand is the moves, the steps, the watchamacallit that encapsulate all 7 minutes if the stupid patriotic-sounding song!

Not only its the corniest moves ever seen, its also complicated! i spent the first few weeks bumping into everyone and mixing up all my steps. And, as a final touch to the humilliation, the instructor has picked me and a buddy of mine to do an Indian solo..which is if i may so, is freaking complicated! Both my friend and i have managed to grasp the steps so far, but the gaya leaves much to be desired. Let's say Ramli Ibrahim would just pengsan when he sees us *shudders*

What i really don't get is how a bunch of people who are supposedly the losers of the whole dance troop (read: those who cannot do the more complicated zapin or the much more stylish hip hop, hence terpaksa do the konon easy muhibbah)are expected to dance for a much longer song and for more moves! i thought u said it was supposed to be easy!!!!

But its interesting to see how everything developed over the span of 2 months. How everyone got their step, how we forged the ease between us, how we work together to perfect our moves (yang tak perfect-perfect lagi tu!), how everyone kept everyone else in check...*sigh* i can't believe i'm actually going to miss this when the annual dinner rolls in next weekend. Not to mention the intense workout i've been enjoying, darn.

Oh yeah, so that explains why i'm drowsy this morning. Sebab semalam menari macam tak ingat dunia. And fasted at that. And at one point my friend thought i was gonna topple over.

And yet i stood :)

Note to self: Patience, patience, patience. Good things come to those who waits. Be grateful of the glimpses you get each day. Insya-Allah, if it was meant to be, things will work out. Just be yourself, don't push it, and keep smiling as what happened this morning should keep your glow right till you fall asleep tonight. Rewind and playback when depressed mode comes on. *sigh*

Reincarnated

how long must i cry
how long do i have to try to make happiness my friend
and how long will it be
until you've come back to me
and let me feel your love again

- Kci & Jojo's "How Long Must I Cry" -

i've been so removed from the world of blogging that i don't even know where to start..there have been times when i would go away, and yet still i return to this page of mine cuz i can't seem to be able to not jot what's been going on in my life, or what i would be thinking, or even just to key in something, just to let my friends know i'm still here; still reading posts, still blog hopping, still hoping that a connection still exists with the world outside...

i've been away for almost 3 months..in that span of time, a million things happened, a thousand sights and sounds savoured, and at times i do feel reborn..i guess that's what a short break does to you: it refreshes your mind, body and soul..verrry cliche', but i find that it's true..

i would like to say that i've grown more confident, more worldly, more mature..but i don't think that's entirely true...i find that as we age, we acquire wisdom naturally, as naturally as how everything falls into place..maybe sometimes we surprise ourselves, by thinking a little differently, or by having different opinions on the same issues we were grappling with previously...or maybe, the peers we keep, helps us to view the world a little differently..

i am still the same old me :) the one who bounces around when she gets too excited, or whenever she gets too much sugar rushing in the veins...she is still the macho-konon-tapi-mushy person that she always is, who would foolishly leave the house with only RM 1 in her pocket, but scours for meaningful songs and lyrics to listen to during her free time (which she regards as total luxury nowadays)..she still procrastinates (a lot!) and she's ever ever so moody at times...unfortunately, lately, she has resurrected an old habit: the inability to eat whenever her object of affection is in sight...

*sigh* some things never change...

i am not going to start with where i left off...this is not a new beginning, merely a continuation of whatever that has always been there, only, hopefully, with a mature perception..

i did say hopefully :)

so, here's to being reincarnated...i hope that i will not lose touch with this blog of mine, cuz as more and more people in Malaysia are riding on the trendy wave of blogging, its kinda nostalgic to say that this has been one loyal shoulder to cry on, one listening post that has never judged, and one place i keep running back to when i feel like screaming my lungs out...

i'm back people, insya-Allah...